only those that matters stay in my life.
Only those that cares also stay in my life.
this change will cause hurt and disappoint in everyone's eyes.
BUT i dont care...
my only concern now is my FAMILY & Friends ( that matters uh )
i need my self confidence back and maybe just maybe improve my physical looks.
i need to claim all that ive lost these 2 yrs.
I MEAN NO ONE WILL EVER STOP ME.
i SWEAR!
Saturday, July 31, 2010
reality check #2
Saturday, July 24, 2010
i cant believe that i actually mistakenly called my friend '**' which is a short-form for my ex-boyf thrice when i was chilling with them. its scary to think of it, but i guess, i have to not think much about it.
frankly speaking, i couldnt care much ishadi mia-ing and told everyone that im the bad one, cos he disappeared far too many times in my life only to return to me, as and when he loves to. As much as i love him, he took me for granted. i dont remember you telling me that you wanna break up with me cos all you've ever did was to keep disappearing. thanks love, for the fake love you gave me :)
honestly speaking, im just too tired to think about all this. the more i tried to seek my happiness, the more hurt i get. i dont see a point of me kept getting hurt when i wanna be happy.
if loving someone will only end up hurting me, why do i need to fall in love?
why do i need to be a lovable and a stick-to-1-policy girlfriend to anyone out there?
i dont need a boyfriend BUT I NEED BOYS FRIENDS.
im tired. if ever i fell in love again, that would be a miracle :P
frankly speaking, i couldnt care much ishadi mia-ing and told everyone that im the bad one, cos he disappeared far too many times in my life only to return to me, as and when he loves to. As much as i love him, he took me for granted. i dont remember you telling me that you wanna break up with me cos all you've ever did was to keep disappearing. thanks love, for the fake love you gave me :)
honestly speaking, im just too tired to think about all this. the more i tried to seek my happiness, the more hurt i get. i dont see a point of me kept getting hurt when i wanna be happy.
if loving someone will only end up hurting me, why do i need to fall in love?
why do i need to be a lovable and a stick-to-1-policy girlfriend to anyone out there?
i dont need a boyfriend BUT I NEED BOYS FRIENDS.
im tired. if ever i fell in love again, that would be a miracle :P
trauma
Saturday, July 17, 2010
my life is just a bore. i dont feel any excitement nor happy anymore.
i cant only meet you once in a while when you yourself dont make any effort, dear!why must i care so much when you yourself treat it like nothing much to bother about.
anyways, i dont mind anymore!!! its just pretty much the same like last year.
im immune..
come everyone, tell me what can makes me happy??!!! please!!!
i cant only meet you once in a while when you yourself dont make any effort, dear!why must i care so much when you yourself treat it like nothing much to bother about.
anyways, i dont mind anymore!!! its just pretty much the same like last year.
im immune..
come everyone, tell me what can makes me happy??!!! please!!!
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
new hair, feel good, look good.
Thanks d for the texts.
i'll try my best k.
Karaoke-ing.
iphone noob.
Mazda Showroom Visit!!
$$$$ more..
IM LOVING IT. :P
i miss my CHiQa, Pravina.
i know its not a proper update. well, im busy! what to do. hehs
Sunday, July 11, 2010
No Longer i need to feel the memories with you. all the wonderful memories becomes a bad one when i found out the truth about you. EVEN deeper truth makes me wanna puke seeing you! hahs. ONCE A JERK, ALWAYS A JERK!!!! to you(insertname), i dont think the memories with you are wonderful anymore. its trash!!! i thank god, you didnt influence me! hehs
ohhh yea....i had awesome fun at kaq Rina's white Affair party..unedited PICTURES here. More coming up soon!
ohhh yea....i had awesome fun at kaq Rina's white Affair party..unedited PICTURES here. More coming up soon!
Thursday, July 8, 2010
i feel so weak. i cant do anything right.
anything that i did right always turn out wrong.
i tried.
but really its draining me dry.
i cant continue being like this.
it have drive me semi-insane.
arghhhh!!!
jika betul ada hikmah
atas ape terjadi pada diriku ini,
ya allah, tenangkn lah fikiranku ini
aku ingin senyum seperti dahulu
:'( :'( :'(
anything that i did right always turn out wrong.
i tried.
but really its draining me dry.
i cant continue being like this.
it have drive me semi-insane.
arghhhh!!!
jika betul ada hikmah
atas ape terjadi pada diriku ini,
ya allah, tenangkn lah fikiranku ini
aku ingin senyum seperti dahulu
:'( :'( :'(
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
telah ku cuba
telah ku rela
telah ku lepaskan.
tapi hati ini pasrah.
hati ini berkecai dan berderai.
andainya aku mampu.
senyuman yang harus aku gambarkan
kesedihan yang harus aku sembunyikan.
aku lelah.
aku lemah.
seandainya aku mampu,
lupakanmu...
pergi jauh dari sisi mu.
mungkin hidupmu akan lebih bahagia.
tapi kebahagianmu adalah kekecewaanku.
aku telah cuba sedaya upaya ku..
jika takdir ini harus aku lalui,
mengapa begitu pahit
dan mengapa ku tk relakan ianya berlalu.
ya allah ya tuhanku
kuatkan semangatku,
tenangkan fikiranku.
berikan aku petunjuk kerna diriku cuma mampu berserah.
telah ku rela
telah ku lepaskan.
tapi hati ini pasrah.
hati ini berkecai dan berderai.
andainya aku mampu.
senyuman yang harus aku gambarkan
kesedihan yang harus aku sembunyikan.
aku lelah.
aku lemah.
seandainya aku mampu,
lupakanmu...
pergi jauh dari sisi mu.
mungkin hidupmu akan lebih bahagia.
tapi kebahagianmu adalah kekecewaanku.
aku telah cuba sedaya upaya ku..
jika takdir ini harus aku lalui,
mengapa begitu pahit
dan mengapa ku tk relakan ianya berlalu.
ya allah ya tuhanku
kuatkan semangatku,
tenangkan fikiranku.
berikan aku petunjuk kerna diriku cuma mampu berserah.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
even if i say i love you,
you cast me aside to despair.
i have to let everyone thinks im happy
cos no one will ever understands how i felt towards someone.
i need you
to be my companion,
to be my enemy,
to be my lover,
And to be my friend.
BUT i guess i cant hold on to you anymore.
you left me behind in despair.
take care love,
i really love you.
i really haf to try my best to be happy. haish
:(
baby you, i love you
Thursday, July 1, 2010
its not love if you dont sacrifice.
its not love if you think of yourself more than your other half.
its not love if you think love is everything.
i have a confession.
i'm in love with you
are you?
well i dont care COS
im in love with you BUT
i have been loving myself much more than anyone loves me.
and thats the best remedy.
its not love if you think of yourself more than your other half.
its not love if you think love is everything.
i have a confession.
i'm in love with you
are you?
well i dont care COS
im in love with you BUT
i have been loving myself much more than anyone loves me.
and thats the best remedy.
